You really don’t know a person, until you live with them.
1. It’s pretty much like a sleepover everyday.
It’s true. You and your partner can stay up late together watching TV, eating and/or making food and have heart-to-hearts that last until the morning. The only difference is, that you share a bed and can makeout without having parents walk in.
2. But you’ll have to compromise on decor.
Moving in together sounds awesome, and it can be, but you won’t be able to have that Pinterest bedroom you pinned the other day. You and your love can have very different tastes and you’ll have to decide together what looks work best for your living space and the both of you. If you’re lucky, he won’t mind your pink pillows and book collection if you allow him to put up pictures of athletes in the living room.
3. And TV time.
Same goes for TV. You can enjoy watching Breaking Bad together, but he or she might not go for your obession with The Newsroom or Storage Wars. Giving up a little freedom is a price to pay, but should be an easy one if you’ve ever had roommates or siblings. The good news is that they can introduce you to new shows. What normally would have been a show you overlooked, can now be your favorite way to spend lazy Sunday afternoons.
4. You’ll slowly stop caring how you look to them.
“Sweatpants, hair-tied, chilling with no makeup on” isn’t just a verse in a Drake song. Living with someone makes you more comfortable with them seeing you as you really are, which is great.
5. But you’ll start to crave your honeymoon phase.
However, being around someone all the time can make a romance turn into what more likely resembles a friendship. Planning date nights and taking time to make your other feel special can help bring back the crazy sparks that living with someone can make complacent.
6. You’ll have to have a talk about money.
Many people don’t realize that a significant other isn’t exactly like a roommate. You can split expenses down the middle, but it’s okay to make adjustments. For instance, if one person has a full-time gig while the other was laid off or in school, the rent can be altered so that one person pays a little more in exchange for above said TV time or never to be on trash duty. That said, you’ll have to understand you may run into a problem where someone may not pay the bills on time, and you’ll have to talk about it.
7. And you’ll need to split chores.
Chores may not seem like a big deal at first, but over time, little things (like the dishes not getting washed or the laundry basket overfilling), can put a strain on any relationship, and leaving passive aggressive roommate Post-Its won’t solve anything. Deciding ahead of time who is responsible for what and when will help prevent the responsibilites falling on one person.
8. You’ll (possibly) have someone to make you dinner.
One of the beauties of living with a partner is getting to benefit from their loves and strengths. If one is good at cooking or baking, the other gets homemade meals once in a while. If one happens to love giving massages, well, the other person is in luck.
9. You’ll have someone to talk to when you get home.
Bad days happen, and there’s nothing better than having someone to vent to after. Friends can help you vent, too, but having someone waiting at home with a hug or a cup of tea makes living together a luxury.
10. You learn about their living habits, for better or worse.
That said, things won’t always be rainbows and butterflies. You may find out about habits that can drive you crazy, whether it’s leaving shoes in the leaving room or something more serious like partying until late and coming home under the influence six days a week. Communicating and compromising these habits can save a relationship. But remember, if someone is making you more stressed than happy, it’s okay to consider moving out.
11. You’ll need space.
Sometimes, you’ll just need time alone. That doesn’t mean you don’t care for the other person, but everyone can only be around someone constantly for so long without needing a break. Make this happen, even if it’s a walk or getting a one bedroom instead of a cramped studio apartment.
12. Which means you’re gonna have a different kind of sex talk.
Although many couples may be used to having sex or hooking up whenever they get a chance, that can change when you move in. When you don’t live with someone, seeing them is a treat, and you both can be on the same page when it comes to wanting sex. But when you live together, and see each other constantly, it’s easier for someone’s sex needs to come at a different time than the other person. This doesn’t mean you guys can’t have a functioning sex life, it just means both parties need to communicate what works for them and if you have to, plan ahead.
13. You’ll learn to pick battles.
Deal breakers are different than little quirks and living together teaches you what to accept about the other person. Or, it’ll teach you how to be open and communicative about issues you have with them.
14. You’ll have to make time for other friends.
This goes hand in hand with having your own space. When you always have someone to hang out with, it’s easy to forget that there are other people that are fun to be around, too. It’ll take extra effort, but having other people in your life to turn to will help keep your life balanced and your friends happy.
15. Your friends may assume you can’t hang out.
That being said, sometimes friends who don’t know what it’s like to live with a boyfriend or girlfriend may assume you are no longer available. This is why it’s important to keep the phone lines open and tell your friends when you want to see them. That doesn’t mean you have to initiate all the time, but inviting them to (insert activity here) with you can let them know you’re still the same person, who just happens to live with someone they love.
16. You will miss having other people as roommates.
As awesome as it can be to watch movies all night and cuddle every day, there will be moments when you miss living with people other than your partner. For instance, if you move in right after college, you might feel a little closet swapping FOMO. If this issue eats at you, perhaps evaluate your move as you may have pulled the trigger too quickly. Scheduling a friend sleepover may appease this, or traveling alone.
17. You’ll have to compromise on pets.
He has always wanted a Husky and you have always wanted a hypoallergenic bunny. Obviously money, time and energy plays a role, but you might have to take the higher road if your partner has allergies or a severe disinterest in picking up poop.
18. People will wonder when you’re getting married (or having a baby).
It’ll happen. Moving in together can mean that marriage is pending, but for other people, living with another person is just that, living with them. Or testing the waters. Either way, don’t feel pressured or bad for people asking when “they’ll pop the question.” Just relax and know that you’re doing what’s best for your relationship.
19. You’ll have to learn how to balance your independence.
Making time for friends is only the beginning of keeping a sense of your independence. When you move in with someone, you fuse into a single entity almost, and you’re more entwined than ever before. That can be scary if you’re used to worrying about yourself and only yourself. To combat this, try taking a class or picking up a new hobby. Your SI will still be around and in your space, but you’ll have something only you can call yours.
20. You might panic about the future.
Think of it as a Matrix moment. You wanted this to happen and then BAM, there you are. You’re grown up, playing house and it’s probably inevitable (if you don’t discover they’re a terrible person) that you’ll be together forever. Just breathe. Moving in together is a huge step and really thinking the situation through shows that you’re serious about the decision. Just don’t think too hard, you’ll freak yourself out. Stay true to the path you want to be on.
21. But if you truly love each other’s company, you won’t want to ever go back.
Living together is hard. It takes work and it’s anything but easy. But if you recognize the hard times, communicate and really want to work things out, cohabitating will become just another step in your life. And an exciting one at that.